Elizabeth Edwards is no victim

By Jeremy Snitkin

Among the very real truths concerning the differences between men and women, a significant one that the public got to witness once more last week is the truth regarding the sexual imperative - a truth that most people inherently know on some level, even if many refuse to acknowledge it. That truth, oversimplified and cogently expressed by Billy Crystal in the movie, "When Harry Met Sally," is this: Sexual accomplishment (conquest) is infinitely more significant to the ego-drive of men than it is to women, just as outward appearance is more significant for women. Put another way - women are judged by their youth and beauty; men are judged by their ability to attract women of youth and beauty.

In the case of Sen. John Edwards, we once again see a relatively powerful, successful middle-age man succumbing to the temptations of a younger woman. As a culture, we like to identify the women involved (often both cuckold and concubine) as victims (seduced and/or abandoned) and the men as perpetrators (seducer/abandoner). In art and literature, the theme of the weak, easily manipulated, somewhat pathetic older man, from "The Blue Angel" to "Double Indemnity" to "Body Heat," is common. In the real world, we don't like to think that our national leaders can be so easily manipulated by a mere girl. Being the perp is so much more macho.

The American cultural imperative that pressures women to look young and men to need to sleep with those women is oppressive to all involved. The feminist movement, while essentially progressive and sexually liberating, has also often emphasized the victim nature of womanhood and served to strengthen a double standard that, in this case, demonizes masculinity in general, and powerful men in particular.

Little has changed since Sigmund Freud noticed that people, as a rule, are pretty mixed up, repressed, confused and neurotic about sex. These stereotypes are damaging to women as well as men. Hillary Rodham Clinton and Elizabeth Edwards are not victims. They are strong, accomplished and enlightened women who, perhaps, are able to see their partners, relationships and family holistically and have been able to include forgiveness in their hearts and vows. They should be heroes to the family values crowd.