Feminism may go too far in girls vs. boys

Feminism may go too far in girls vs. boys by Holly Bowne

I recognize that U.S. Sen. Hillary Clinton has the ability and as much right as any man to run for president. I firmly believe in equal pay for equal work, and that women can do any job they set their minds to doing. I grew up witnessing the many positive changes feminism has brought about -- including economic and political gains for women, as well as changes in the way we live, dress, make a living and dream of a future.

But as I sat in the stands of my local indoor soccer facility, watching my son's under-12 boys team being physically abused by a girls team, I couldn't help but wonder if perhaps feminism has finally gone too far.

During the game, I saw a female player actually punch one of our boys in the back of his head (the ref did not see it) and later, I saw my own son's face being smashed into the boards by another young lady. (The ref did see that.) I noted the parents of the girls' team smiling smugly whenever one of their players managed to knock over one of our boys.

Now, the fact is, when you get into the age of puberty and beyond, most of those boys could, if they chose, send a girl flying into the boards at any point. Feminism aside, it's a simple fact of nature that men are physically stronger than women. But they are taught never to use that physical strength against a woman.

Listening to the grumbling coming from the parents of the boys, it was obvious that our guys weren't playing their best game. They would hesitate for a second too long or hold back just a bit, yielding to a baser instinct not to hurt a girl. Our boys were simply not playing full-out against this girls team. And to be honest, I'm not sure I would have wanted them to.

We drill it into our boys' heads from a very young age that they should never push, shove or hit a girl; if anything, they are to step to the defense of a girl when necessary. Then we put them all out on the soccer field -- basketball court, wrestling mat, pick a sport -- together where the boys are supposed to be as physically competitive with girls as they would be with boys. We are confusing our boys.

If men abusing women is never appropriate, why should the reverse ever be all right? Our culture seems to be blurring the lines between feminism and offensivism.

I recall a shopping trip I made with my daughter a couple of years ago. As we were browsing in one of the popular mall shops, we came across some T-shirts that stated "Boys Are Stupid -- Throw Rocks at Them." We were appalled, and I had barely uttered the words, "Who would buy something like that?" when we noticed a young mother on the other side of the display searching for a shirt in her little girl's size. Do we women really need to teach our girls to bash boys, physically and emotionally, to make our mark in the world?

After the soccer game, I asked a manager why this talented girls team didn't play up a few levels within the girls division instead of entering the boys' leagues. I was told that prohibiting them from playing in the boys division would be considered discrimination. Amazing. Women have fought a long, hard battle to earn equal rights. We now have clubs, sports, colleges and political organizations solely for women and the support of women's rights. But we're still not satisfied.

We are raising our boys to be men in a world that increasingly disrespects men in a variety of venues. If we truly believe in equal rights, then we women need to speak up and stop allowing TV programs, clothing, and even children's sports to get away with the male bashing that is going on. We need to build up our boys instead of tearing them down. We need to teach them how to be men. Men who are intelligent, sensitive and strong.

Men who know how to treat a lady.